My favorites from Week 523:
Week 523: "...propose ways to make modern life harder than it needs to be."
Third Runner-Up: It is no longer sufficient to clean up after your dog. By law, you must catch the offending substance before it hits the ground. (Andrea Kelly, Brookeville)
Presume innocence. (John Ashcroft, Washington) (Brendan Beary, Great Mills, Md.)
Drive-on-the-left-side-of-the-road Thursday. (Russell Beland, Springfield)
Adapt to all appliances the "Are you sure?" message that computers demand before deleting something. Microwave a burrito: "Are you sure?" Change the channel: "Are you sure?" (Will Cramer and Julie generics, Herndon)
All pills must be suppositories. (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge)
Bicycle-pedaled flush toilets. (Dan Steinberg, Falls Church)
Diplomacy. (George W. Bush, Washington) (Brendan Beary, Great Mills, Md.)
Adopt California recall rules for all government positions. If you get 500 signatures and a filing fee, you can recall your postman. (Kevin d'Eustachio, Linwood, N.J.)
